On Changes

I am fond of collecting quotable quotes, and through the years I have collected not quite a few. However, there are quotes that deeply made an impression on me that I never forget them. One of them is “The only constant thing in┬áthe world is change”.

Now, what made me all of a sudden gets melodramatic over my collection of quotes? The culprit is my family’s imminent relocation to another place. And, its imminence hangs like Damocles’ sword above my head.

I know I should be happy because our transfer would mean I would have a better job, a more comfortable abode, and I could be with my husband and live with him. It would mean my family could finally be living together in one roof for the first time ever.

IMG_7268I should be happy I know. But I just can’t help it that it weighs down on my heart. For though there are advantages, there are also things that holds me down that makes me want to stay.

Foremost, I am going to terribly miss my church ministries which I had come to love and care so much about. They are my life’s blood. Not doing them would leave me dry and high.

Secondly, I would miss my best friend, who is concurrently my ministry partner, decorating partner, visitation partner and prayer warrior.

Thirdly, I would miss my writing jobs. They have become part of my routine that not doing them could create a void in my heart. Blog writing gives me a release from my cramped emotions. On the other hand academic writing gives me the intellectual satisfaction my mind seeks.

I don’t know if I would ever find a respite from this feeling of sadness. I don’t know if I’m going to love my job there. I don’t know if I could ever comeback to the place which is home to me for 38 long years. I don’t know if I could have my ministries again. But one thing is sure, I would definitely keep my friendship in my heart. I just hope my friend would be well enough and strong enough to hold on till God’s will is fulfilled in our lives. And I earnestly hope deep in my heart, that the change that will soon occur is just a signal for a new beginning of a blessing-filled and victorious life.